Let’s face it, writers; when it comes to writing a book, romance is the hardest thing to write.  There are two things you can do: swear off all romance in a book or grit your teeth and bear it.  The first is definitely an option, but if you’re even considering romance in your novel, chances are that’s because you want it there and wouldn’t find the story nearly as interesting without it.  I’m not sure what it is about romance, but out of all the categories (action, emotion, dialogue, etc.) it is the hardest, most boring, most embarrassing, most aggravating kind of writing to tackle.  In my case I’m sure part of the problem is I’ve never been in love.  I don’t know what one feels or acts or says.  Unlike the rest of my writing, I can’t draw from my own personal experience, so I’m forced to study other people’s, which contributes to my second problem: I’m really just copying off the words of other writers I’ve read.  This means two things happen: it ceases to be my natural style (it becomes stiff and stands out from the rest of the chapter) and I easily fall into cliches and excessive mushiness.  Suddenly I find it’s not my story at all.  No longer are you reading the brilliant and original work of Amanda Kenney; you suddenly find that you are reading every boring, hackneyed love scene you have read a hundred times before, the only difference being that this version is a little more annoying.  Then I’m caught between two extremes: taking their romance a little too seriously, or not taking it seriously enough.  The first time I write it, I tend toward the former.  When I come back and read it later, red with embarrassment, I hack it down to the bare bones and try to make it almost a joke.  That’s just my natural approach to things, but it does make it difficult for the characters to ever get serious about each other.  I personally prefer the type of relationship where the two involved are a really natural pair, so being together is just a normal, everyday thing; they don’t need a bunch of drama and mushy sentences whenever they look at each other.  That sort of stuff is reserved for special occasions.  Most of the time they just want to work and laugh together, which is fun to write and to read.  That takes care of my problem for the majority of the book, but on the other hand it amplifies it when it comes time to take care of those ‘special occasions’.  I’ve been putting off all mushy words between them, so when they finally say them it doesn’t sound like something they’d say; I have to work and sweat and beat the words out to make it sound natural and smooth.  I can’t stand characters being mushy and lovestruck 24/7, but if being romantic is awkward because it’s not their pattern of behavior (to the point of being practically against their nature), it makes my job twice as hard.  The first kiss becomes almost unbearable because it’s so unusual.

So what’s a writer to do?  Well, unfortunately, the best thing to do is just keep hacking at it until you finally get it right, even if it takes a hundred rewrites.  You work it out until it’s balanced.  Fortunately, there are some things you can do to hopefully make it easier.  One thing is know your characters really well.  That way you know what they would say and how they would say it; it’ll sound natural.  Secondly, a good way to cut down on the mushy and melodramatic in your scene is to narrate as little as possible.  Don’t try to describe the emotions and sensations the character is feeling; just tell the bald, honest facts.  Keep it short and to the point.  Be charming and light about the whole matter.  Generally I’ve found the less you say the better.  If your reader likes your characters and their relationship, they’ll generate enough emotions over the romantic sequence for ten people.  Too many cliched, abstract descriptions tend to cut down on the ability of the reader to connect with the characters.  A short ‘Her heart was racing’ is ten times better than ‘She felt like lightning was running through her’ or ‘She felt like she could fly’.  Leastways I think it is.  This is where it’s important to rely on your best ally: your own style and your own honest writer’s instinct.  Let them be your guide.  After all, part of the problem is being too influenced by things you’ve read before.  Last of all, be balanced; don’t hold back but don’t let your writing run away with you.  And that’s the real challenge: making your words sound natural while controlling them tightly.